He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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