corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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