then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
being pregnant is like rehab
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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