How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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