What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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