I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
