I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
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