Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I want to be your penis for a week.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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