Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
