Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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