it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
