it hurts more in the daytime
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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