I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
