2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
