Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
