youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
