Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
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