have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
