I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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