It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
