I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
