So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
