with your own penis?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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