just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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