I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
