oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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