yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
