I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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