There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
