Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
