So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
