there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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