No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
