I must be too annoying 4 u.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
