This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
