And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
