My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Your cock deserves a montage
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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