yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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