He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
