rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Holy sore nipples Batman
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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