This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
