so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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