Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize