It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just invented taco cereal.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
