Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
We need to get me chipped asap
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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