yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
one might say we're banned from that church
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
The Olympian is in my bed
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
