Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
