She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
it's like heaven, but drunker
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
