So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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