Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize