I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
